It was everything, those nights on the phone, everything we said until late became later and then later and very late and finally to go to bed with my ear warm and worn and red from holding the phone close close close so as not to miss a word of what it was, because who cared how tired I was in the humdrum slave drive of our days without each other. I’d ruin any day, all my days, for those long nights with you, and I did. But that’s why right there it was doomed. We couldn’t only have the magic nights buzzing through the wires. We had to have the days, too, the bright impatient days spoiling everything with their unavoidable schedules, their mandatory times that don’t overlap, their loyal friends who don’t get along, the unforgiven travesties torn from the wall no matter what promises are uttered past midnight, and that’s why we broke up.
It’s so nice to hear your laugh
It’s good to see you
I’m glad you’re here
That was clever
You’re so thoughtful
You make me laugh
I enjoy your company
I sit before flowers
hoping they will train me in the art
of opening up
I stand on mountain tops believing
that avalanches will teach me to let go
but I am here to learn.
So many things happen and I want to post about it and complain, but I struggle to find the right words.
I just want to pour my soul out on someone and not have to worry about the mess I’ve made.